Before I gave it to her, I often checked and returned email using my cell phone during daytime as I cannot access personal email from office pc. After I gave it to her, I could not do it any more, which, at first, seemed a bit odd. But after a few days, I feel like “no big deal.” I haven’t missed anything when I postponed email checking.

In the past, there is absolutely no need for me to check email. I did it just because I could. In fact, without this possibility, I found that I have one less distraction now, which is wonderful for time saving.

On the other hand, I have found my daughter constantly interrupts her homework by texting or checking her cell phone as if she expects something. On 5/2, less than two weeks after she owns a phone, when I told her jokingly that I needed to borrow her phone for a day or two, she said resoundingly “No way.” I have noticed the changes that this gadget brought to her in such a short period of time.

My son used to shut down instant message and cell phone when he needed total concentration. We need a statement to ourselves so that we don’t give up control over our lives to any outside forces. Some type of mechanism needs to be installed so that we can guarantee that our time is not subjected to the whims of outside interruptions.

There I saw a large stretch of land laying wasted. The vegetables are not well taken care of. There were about four people working there. Obviously they need more hands on the farm.

We spent some time picking snap pea. After picking about a pound of them, we decided to call it a day as both of us felt tired. I did not buy much for the trip. But I think I did learn the hardship of farm work. I wish my daughter came with us.

If you have a great sense of worth and accomplishment tied up in your work, terminating your job completely may not work well for you.

Your financial readiness is the next thing you should consider. I was surprised that not many physicians are ready for retirement by the time they feel like to. Because they even have not earned enough or have not saved enough.

Don’t sell your stocks during recession. “The people who weathered the last recession the best were the ones who held tight to a diversified portfolio and continued adding money to it.”

Last, resist the urge to chase “can’t miss” investments, such as private partnerships that purchase real estate or invest in various types of businesses: restaurants, car washes, and the like. “Nine times out of 10 these things don’t work out.”

She was preparing for her trip to China around the end of this month. After that, my mind ran back to the time when I worked at Sprint back in 2000 and when she was single, showing no interest in talks about children.

Over a decade has passed since that time, yet it all seems like yesterday when we worked together. I can’t believe time runs so fast and children grow up so fast.

Enjoy the moment while we can.

I told her not to think of what she didn’t have, in this case, her youth. Think of what she has now. Compare to those who were not lucky enough to live this long, we have to count our blessing. I told her about Andrew Breitbart who died of heart disease at age 43 and some of the patients at my work place who died in their 40s.

Sometimes, when we think of what we have, we might feel blessed and content. And no more complaints.

What is remarkable about his life is his 9 decades of violin teaching career. He started teaching when he was 11 and he had a student who was 10, until the day before he died at age 101.

I told my daughter of his long teaching career. “The man must enjoy what he was doing,” she said. “Absolutely,” I said. “It must have given him tremendous joy doing what he loved everyday. I hope you can find something you enjoy and keep doing what brings you joy as long as Totenberg.”

At first, I didn’t want to go as I was afraid it would take too much time. My daughter will have some finals next week. When I told my daughter of this, she said we should go. So we did.

I met another Chinese mother who was more inclined toward natural science than humanities. I shared with her my writing on KC Star on that day, not sure if she understood it. I used to believe there was not much difference between science and humanities.

One needs to be more empirical and logical in natural science. With humanities, the emphasis is more on understanding and interpretation, which is very subjective and varies from person to person. But a clear thinking ability is needed in both fields. I think there must be a lot more than this.

“There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It’s why you were born & how you become most truly alive!!!”

I think I read it before. It seems I read it as a Mother’s Day reminder. With this, I suddenly remember that number one person is myself. I will try to remember this on this special day for mothers.

P.S. my son called from San Fransisco this morning to say “Happy Mother’s Day.” Indeed, happy I am.

He added: “If accosted by a strange black in the street, smile and say something polite but keep moving.” And “if you are white or Asian and have kids, you owe it to them to give them some version of the talk. It will save them a lot of time and trouble spent figuring things out for themselves. It may save their lives.” Derbyshire was fired by the National Review for these words.

When I read these words, my first impression is how can people think this way and have the guts to write and publish it. Some people do not care about the impact of their writing on the public, as if black were all illiterate and couldn’t read. It would be terribly awful if you were a black and read about this? I still can’t believe someone could think and write like this.

P.S. my second column comes out today. I have posted it here around the end of April. But I forgot having done so. Can’t believe I am getting so forgetful now.

Desirable cholesterol level
–total <200
–HDL >40 for male >50 for female
–LDL <70-130 depending on risk factors
–triglycerides <150

Not overeating can improve your blood sugar
–Because you are eating possibly half as much food
–Eating when you are not hungry causes insulin to be released.

How to raise your HDLs
–exercise
–it can take 6-12 months to see a difference in HDLs through walking
–diets, exercise and the way you are eating can improve it

Now it makes me feel so good after sharing with my readers.

I appreciate his honesty and political courage. He has been consistent on defending equal rights for all. For all, he deserves respect and support of the majority of people.

In contrast, his political opponent, Mitt Romney is famous for being flip-flopping, changing position as frequently as one changes underwear. If Obama is characterized of being consistent, Romney is just the opposite.

The country should be proud for having the first President who stands for equal right regardless of sexual orientation.

After that, my daughter asked me if I was going to write something on President Obama on midwest voices. I said no, because this is a republican state and more readers are against Obama. Unless I write something anti-Obama, I would invite personal attacks.

My daughter said, “This is a democratic country and you should be able to say what you believe without fear.” She is right, but still I will avoid as much as I can the unpleasantness of reading nasty comments, until I become zen enough not to care whatever.

Nicolas Sarkozy lost by 48.1% to Hollande’s 51.9%. The socialist victory in France is very symbolic. It seems to send a positive message to President Obama and seems to herald a change of wind in politics, with the upcoming of the socialist-leaning parties.

If Sarkozy was seen as “President of the Rich” and voters turned away from him, Obama can compare Sarkozy to his presidential opponent and label him as “politician of the rich” who is going to implement austerity measure by cutting deep programs that benefit the poor.

It will be interesting to see the impact of France’s new socialist president and the reactions of both parties here in U.S.

At the moment like this, I wish I had a good camera or I could capture the scene or I knew how to use a good one. Too bad I didn’t, so I have to borrow one by Darryl Webb/Reuters.

In the evening when I was driving my daughter to Target, my daughter and I had a conversation on happiness. Actually, it doesn’t take much for us to feel happy.

First, we are on top of our tasks or successful at our role. Second, we are physically fit, that is, in good shape, in a comfortable environment, not tortured by any extreme weather.

No amount of material possessions can make us happy if we are not as successful as we expect or not physically fit. That’s why there is a saying that goes like this: you create your own happiness.

Of course, I was curious to know what these five things are, even though I believe Kate can very well just be her unique self, one of a kind, without the need to imitate anyone at all. After I read them, I think the first two are good advices to all people. Here are the 5 things.

(1) Resist the lure of celebrity and cultivate humility.
(2) Stay with your look and be consistent with her style; it shows confidence and reassures the public.
(3) Master your brief.
(4) Embrace the countryside and its pursuits.
(5) Support William without overshadowing him.

(1) I don’t care how much you know until I know how much you care.
(2) “The customer you lost holds the information you need to succeed,” The Loyalty Effect by Frederick Reichheld.
(3) Service recovery is treating the customer well when something goes wrong.

Openly expressed disappointment can be a gift to an organization because research shows that the trust of a person is strengthened if the problem is handled properly.

Conflict resolution steps:
Take the HEAT
Hear them out –If somebody yells at you, you tend to get defensive. If you interrupt someone, he tends to get louder and madder.
Empathize –put yourself in customer’s situation
Apologize — say I am sorry when you should
Take responsibility for action.

Poor customer service is expressed through intonation, disrespect, showing slight, making customer feel less important by not having the full attention, and other non-verbal body language. On the other hand, good customer service means respect others by giving full attention, keeping eye contact, smile, caring tone, and self-introduction.

I remember sometimes my daughter gets upset when she talks while I am not giving her full attention. Now I know this is called not showing due respect.

Key principles of good customer service include:
(1) Maintain or enhance self-esteem — you get your self-esteem from feedback from others, other people contribute to it. You praise people for something specific in order to enhance his self-esteem. e.g. “How can we do without you?”

(2) Listen and respond with empathy –listening, response, eye contact, put yourself in other’s shoe. Validate the feelings of others.

(3) Involve the customer. Involvement means empowering, release anxiety, give them control or options.

The wonderful part is you can actually use these principles in all human dealings.

They are largely four types of customer reactions:
(1) Patron – a happy customer but has not expressed this verbally
(2) Praiser – a happy customer who either sends a thank you letter or verbally expressed it.
(3) Walker – an unhappy one but says nothing about it, just walk away and never return.
(4) Talker – an unhappy one and let you know immediately of his unhappiness by verbalizing it.

At first, I thought the kind of customer reaction is more determined by one’s personality, the out-going customers being more verbal while introverts tend to be either patron or walker. I was surprised to learn that 9 out of 10 unhappy customers are walkers.

I think it is in the culture that people avoid confrontation and choose passive aggressiveness when they are not happy. In fact, you can see the same pattern of response in all human interactions, including within a family. The introverts tend to walk away without a word when they are upset, but the unhappiness is still there. The out-going ones will shout and yell and let the world know their unhappiness. Very interesting.