A family man met his death at the hand of a high-priced call girl


I read this piece of news on 7/9 about a Google exec’s overdose death on yacht.

The 26-year-old high-priced call girl Alix Tichelman and 51-year-old google executive Forrest Hayes “met on SeekingArrangement.com, which according to the website is, for sugar daddies and sugar babies seeking mutually beneficial relationships and arrangements.”

They had met a few times before their Nov. 26 encounter on Hayes’ 50-foot yacht, Escape, at the Santa Cruz Small Craft Harbor, said Santa Cruz Deputy Police Chief Steve Clark.”

The “SANTA CRUZ Police have arrested the call girl from Georgia who is suspected of injecting heroin into a Santa Cruz tech executive on his yacht and then fleeing when he overdosed.

“Tichelman, who allegedly worked as a call girl, had an ‘ongoing prostitution relationship’ with Hayes, who was married and a father of five, police said.”

“Hayes, originally from Dearborn, Michigan, worked in the auto industry early in his career. He lived in Santa Cruz for years and worked at technology giants such as Sun Microsystems, Apple and Google, according to his friends and family. He is survived by his wife of 17 years and his five children.

“Forrest will be remembered above all as a loving husband and father. More than anything else he enjoyed spending time with his family at home and on his boat,” according to a January obituary that his family wrote for the Sentinel. “His brilliant mind, contagious smile and warm embrace will be missed and cherished in memories by his friends and family.”

Family man–Hayes’ co-workers and friends described him as intelligent, a family man with a great sense of humor with a penchant for impulse buys.”

This is a big joke or what — a loving husband and father, a family man with 5 children messed up with a 26-year-old high-priced call girl and lost his life? Would he be still alive if he were a truly family man? Of course, he would. Someone got to come up with a new definition of a family man , that is the one with “ongoing prostitution relationship” to convince me that he was one of them.

I know I shouldn’t be too harsh to a “dear departed.” Still, truth be told, he got himself in this ending. A lesson for all is, no matter how rich and successful you are, be good and don’t do what Forrest Hayes had done to himself and to his family. What a shameful ending!



A happy family is the key to one’s health


A happy family is the key to ones health and happiness
I will translate this later.



A very pleasant trip to New York City and Boston


Last Friday, 5/30, three of us went to New York. We left early in the morning and arrived early in the afternoon. We picked up a rental car at the airport, then drove to my son’s apartment at the corner of Park Avenue and 62nd street, to the east of Central Park in Manhattan.

We parked the car in a public parking garage, then walked to my son’s apartment. There we waited till his girlfriend came back from work. Then, five of us drove out of New York to Boston. We stopped overnight at Meriden, CT, Hawthorn Suites, and continued our way the next morning, 5/31, Saturday.

We went to tour Boston College and then walked on Boston busy streets. In the evening, we drove to Northampton, stopped overnight at Hartford, MA. We drove back to New York City Sunday morning, said goodbye to my son and his girlfriend, returned the rental car, took the shuttle bus to the airport. By the time we got back home, it was around 1:30 AM, Monday morning.

What a wonderful weekend!



An ideal family or what a relationship between two should be


This is from a friend of mine. It is all well said, yet I have not seen anything like that from what I observe among my friends and acquaintances. In fact, the opposite is what I know of. Well, this is at least what an ideal family or relationship should be.

(1) The couple should pay attention to the changes in, the strength of and the positive words articulated by each other.
(2) There should be less complaint, less blame-game, less misunderstanding in a family.
(3) Think more of what each other has done. Truly appreciate each other’s strength. Understand each other’s situation. Forgive each other’s weakness.
(4) Words should be often said inside a family:
-Thank you.
-I am sorry I made a mistake.
-I believe you.
-I am proud of you.
-I love you.
(5) The couple should try to have a common life’s goal, environment of living, conversation topic, and friends.
Finally, there is no right or wrong in a family. There is only harmony and lack of harmony. Family is the place where love dominates not reason.



Advice for future Daughter-in-laws


This is what I read from a magazine while I was in China. It is a challenge to maintain a normal relationship between mother-in-laws and daughter-in-laws. Hence, it is wise to avoid the following before marriage.

(1) Postpone meeting your in-laws as long as possible.

(2) Don’t get into the habit of buying expensive stuffs for your future in-laws, as this tends to develop an expectation on their part.

(3) Don’t offer to do too much household. Instead of appreciating your hard work at home, they tend to take it for granted, as if this is what you SHOULD do.

(4) Don’t talk about your family to your in-law family. You never know how your in-laws interpret the stories in your family.

(5) Don’t stay too long in your in-laws house, as if you were eager to sell yourself cheaply. Keep your distance.

(6) Don’t stay overnight in in-laws’ house.

(7) Spend as much time as possible with your family, as this is where you belong and where people truly love you.

(8) Say NO and show your displeasure when needed. When you perceive a hint of disrespect from your in-laws, don’t just eat dirt and say nothing. Your silence might be understood as being weak and easy to bully around. By polite and modest, but not humble to the point of losing your personal integrity.

(9) Never spend too much money on your in-laws family, even when there is a need.



The day I left Beijing…


Flash back to the day I left Beijing on 6/18/2012, less than a month ago. I got up early that day, had breakfast around 7 AM, left for the airport rather early.

By the time we arrived at the Beijing Capital International Airport, it was a little after 9 AM. Already there was a long line waiting for boarding pass and lugguge check-in. I was standing on the line while my mother and my sister were sitting on a nearby bench.

Everything went well with me that morning. After taking some pictures and saying goodbye to them, I was on my way passing both security check and custom.

When I finally dragged my feet to Gate E26, I felt tired, hungry and an overwhelming feeling of sadness, the kind of feeling that I had every time I was sitting at the airport.

I felt this way when I first left home in 1984. Here I was still in Beijing, yet after passing the guarded gate, there seemed no way for us to communicate, seemed like we lost contact with each other, more so as I was traveling far away from home. I could see my family stood there for a long time watching me out of sight.


Today I Learn… is proudly powered by WordPress and themed by Mukka-mu