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1, Mar 13, 2011

Developing Your Emotional Intelligence, Part 8

Filed under: Emotional Intelligence — admin @ 12:31 am

Anger Management, part II
There are some common misconceptions about anger. Contrary to popular belief, venting anger does little or nothing to dissipate it. Actually, venting is one of the worst ways to cool off after an outburst. It fuels the brain’s emotional arousal and leaves people feeling more angry, not less. The right anger management is to defuse it by early intervention.

There are three types of intervention that can lessen or eliminate anger. In fact, any anger mood can be sidestepped altogether if caught in its earliest stage. Don’t wait till it is too late. For example, a man has just blown up at his boss. As his anger escalated, he couldn’t think straight and was oblivious to the consequences of any actions he might take. At this point, it became very difficult for him to defuse.

(1) Challenge the thoughts that spark the anger. This is most effective when undertaken at early or moderate levels of anger. Once enraged, a person is no longer capable of rational thought–only of revenge and reprisal.

(2) Distraction–it is useful for diminishing an angry mood. TV, movie or reading can take your mind off the hostile thoughts. But shopping or eating may worsen anger by allowing you to dwell on the triggering situation.

(3) Physical activity–you can deflate anger by engaging in a physical activity, especially by yourself. Deep breathing and relaxation exercises are also effective.

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