How to Resolve Interpersonal Conflict VI: Aggression vs Assertive Confrontation

During the workshop, we talked about the difference between aggression and assertive confrontation. People tend to associate confrontation with aggression, but it doesn’t have to be that way. It is much easier to be assertive if you confront a situation the first time you realize there is a problem and deal with it tactically.

If you fail to be assertive and avoid conflict by putting it off, the problem will never go away by itself. On the contrary, you run the risk of making it worse. The longer the situation continues, the more anger and frustration builds up inside you. Finally, you let it go, and direct that anger towards the other person.

To make sure that your communication remains assertive, be certain that you present facts as facts, feelings as feelings, and opinions as opinions. Don’t mix them up. Confronting a situation right away also reduces the temptation to refer back to previous incidents, which tends to shift the focus from prevention of a future occurrence to finding out exactly what happened in the past.

In one word, be assertive and timely so when you have to be this way and never let anger and frustration build up and eat you up. This applies to all sorts of conflicts.

P.S. I started working on two locations since this Monday, SW and SMMC. When I went back to SW, old friends greeted me with so much enthusiasm, which made me embarrassed as I could hardly remember their names.

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