Today I Learn… I make a point of learning something new everyday. This is what I learn each day

1, Jul 10, 2010

Parents Permissiveness and Children Defiance Do Not Develop Overnight

Filed under: Parenting 101 — admin @ 12:48 am

I have personally observed many cases where parents talk and beg while children ignore and defy as if the authority were on the side of the children. To be sure, children defiance can make parenting a rather harrying and even devastating experience instead of what should be a rewarding and joyful one.

I would not blame children for being too recalcitrant. A child is never born this unruly. Like all habits, it takes some time, some try-and-error and even parents’ cooperation for this type of interaction to take form. I realize it is easy to say than to actually do it. Still, parents need to put into actions certain rules in order to hinder the development of any unpleasant defiant behavior.

(1) If you ask a child three times to do one thing. STOP yourself. Set a rule. Ask once next time.
(2) Never ever tolerate any disrespect from your child. If you catch it once, set it right loud and clear.
(3) Never raise your voice. If you cannot control yourself, forget any attempt at controlling your child.
(4) Never take any negative, conflict-ridden attitude.
(5) Finally, if you are genuinely at loss, turn to your child for help. Ask him/her what he/she would do if this or that happens. Trust me they are like freshman congressman, full of ideas and opinions.

If anything, parenting, first and foremost, means self-discipline.

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