I often hear people talk about parents’ expectations of their children.  To be sure, I myself also have expectations. It is so natural that we all have our reasonable expectations.  But I try not to let my children know what my expectations are.

Instead, very often, I ask them, “What do you expect of yourself?”  “What do you want to get done this summer?”  “What do you want to become of when you grow up?”  I encourage them to have a goal of their own and to expect something of themselves.  Instead of saying, “I am so disappointed of you,” I would ask them if they are disappointed of themselves. 

It would be a sad waste if they live their lives only to meet other people’s expectations without anything of their own.  Of course, I do not mind having my expectations met if they could be ever met.